Second Medicals for Tytus

We got Tytus's second medicals on thursday! YAY! This is a big step. As soon as my pediatrician looks them over, then they will begin gathering the paperwork to submit to court. So basically Violet and Tytus's adoptions are in the same place. I'm really starting to wonder if we're going to end up getting Tytus first. Wouldn't that be crazy!
Violet's paperwork is still spinning in circles. So, I'll spare you the details, honestly they're so confuzing and we take two steps forward three steps back so it's hard to follow. We haven't actually made any progress since April.
God continues to work me over and turn me inside out. The last few weeks He has been giving me a glimpse into my own heart. About how I was allowing bitterness to take root. About how I was blaming my problems on the adoption and not realizing, it's my heart that is the problem. I've once again strayed from depending on Him everyday. I'm not walking closely with my savior. I'm thinking only about the adoption and pretty much nothing else. And basically that amounts to worshipping the adoption and not Him. I find myself crying out, "How long O God? How long will you not answer me?" And last week I heard him say back, "How long O Katy? How long will you not worship me?"
He is remaking me, refining me. Though I may hate to admit it, I'm going to be a better mom because of all of this. I've prayed that God would prepare my heart and I just didn't realize how much work it needed.
I will choose this day to worship the one and only God, because He alone is worthy.